Why you should layer your communication to hit the sweet spot

Being an effective communicator, speaking confidently in meetings and being a good networker, all have more in common than you’d think with the trifle.

The holiday season is here and one of the most popular Christmas desserts is trifle.

And just writing about it makes my mouth water.

So, what’s a trifle?

It's yummy, is what it is.

Think sponge, fruit, jelly, custard, an optional dash or big dash of sherry, and whipped cream. Perhaps a sprinkling of toasted almonds on top of that.

Each of these ingredients on their own is great but together they are a rhapsody.

A big bowl of loveliness itself.

The humble trifle features in an episode of “Friends.”

Rachel made one.

And bless her, she did do her best, but she got a bit confused and included a bizarre ingredient she really shouldn't have.

I’ll pop the link to the funny clip at the end of the article so that you can appreciate the full glory of Rachel’s culinary skills.

Let’s just say the only fan she had of her creation was Joey, who will pretty much eat anything, and so that’s an indication of  how well it turned out.

But when a trifle is done well it impresses.

And people appreciate it.

Just like effective communication.

And with that smooth transition, here's my recipe for effective communication using the trifle as a metaphor:

1) The setting is important

Think about where you’ll have that conversation. Normally, trifles are presented in a beautiful fancy bowl, often crystal, and it looks very classy.

It sets the scene.

If you're having a chat with someone that might be about something sensitive, where is the ideal place for that? And importantly, where would you both be comfortable?

And if you’re looking for a bright and breezy chat, where is the best location for that? Check in with the person you’re meeting. And agree a mutually agreeable spot to talk.

2) Sort out your structure

Think about what you'd like to say. The topics that you'd like to cover. And have a think about the order of how you'd like to share that.

What seems best? What flows?

A trifle looks impressive with each of the different layers adding something.

And it's precisely because of how beautifully the trifle is constructed that it's such a success.

Think about it for a moment: If you took all the same ingredients and chucked them in a bowl, it's not going to have the wow factor, is it?

People are going to be a bit bewildered.

So, how can you build up what you are saying so that it has the impact you want it to have?

3)    Think short and sweet

A little goes a long way. Trifle is a sweet treat and sometimes all you need is a small helping.

Think about the words you use when you communicate.

Does your message get lost in a few paragraphs? Do you get yourself tied up in knots with lots of sentences?

How can you capture your message?

What's the essence of it?

Share that and this will help you avoid using all the words and serving up the entire trifle.

Which would result in overwhelming your audience.

So, the next time you’re looking to deliver a message that your audience appreciates, remember these tips.

And also consider making a trifle.

If you’d like support to develop your communication skills and get seen, heard and valued in your workplace, send me a line. I’d love to support you with that.

Finally, before we wrap up, here’s the clip with Rachel’s unique take on the trifle. And a reminder of how not to mess with dessert.